The first time I fell in love was over a year ago. I remember the moment it happened perfectly. The sounds around me disappeared, the air was crisp but I didn’t feel it, and the people passing as we walked the streets stopped moving past us. We were in our own world carving our own little path through the city. The weeks following the moment were lovely. It was a construction process; building and rebuilding this world until one day the structures and all its light fell off into space. The people around us started moving again, I began to feel the air, and sounds seemed harsher than before. Despite the phrase “Let go” being tattooed onto my collar bone, it is one of the hardest things to do. I wanted to start again, salvage what bits of our world we still had. Salvation, however, was not in our cards. Our connection, though, is still present – and I have begun to believe it will always be.
Connections of this sort are rare and when you’ve found yourself wrapped up in one, hold on to it with gratitude. Malaysian musician, Yuna, embodies this in her delectablly wonderful track “Lullabies.” The original’s downtempo drum beat is carried over into Jim-E Stark’s remix where Yuna’s vocals float over symphonic synths and an infectious melody. The minimal production lends itself to a sublime atmosphere of lush sounds and deep vibrations. It’s a sound space to get lost in.
Yuna’s lyrics are put on focus here. Her delivery is honest, un-pained, and pure. She sounds neither desperate or selfish. She is simply stating all the things she wanted to do with this other, an other who has left her life physically. It’s as if she’s sending off her confessions into space to rid herself of them as a means of moving on. It’s a calm acceptance of her past relationship and belief in the humble haunting of their connection.
While it may be cliche to say that you never truly get over your first love, I have to believe that it’s cliche because it’s true. If you haven’t fallen in love this song will still resonate with you. We all have a connection with someone that’s on a different level than your friends and bests. We all are connected to someone in a way that’s different than other connections. Those connections have changed, labels dropped, but we are all still in contact with them; not because we can’t let them go, but because they’re somehow always there. And that’s okay.