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SOHN – Signal

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Like an unmoving body of water, Signal begins. Calm and calculated, first, the waves move slowly. Then, like an animal’s head piercing calm waters, SOHN’s voice comes in. Still, there’s barely any unsettling. The stormy weather SOHN sings of takes place inside of him. The song mimics that apparent composure some of us spend our lives perfecting.

Signal, wave across the water for me.”

That’s all he’s asking.

There are moments in my life I’ve convinced myself I’m not waiting in the dark. A signal from another was all I longed for. But really, it wasn’t. I thought it was just a sign but what I wanted was for another to carry me. Expectations are usually larger than what we convince ourselves we need.

Give me shelter, please.

Let me be the man I wanted to be.”

As though some sign from another is what would allow me to fully be. As though I needed your permission. As though you’d ever give it to me. The mere thought that I’d need you to do anything, means the “me” is gone. It means there’s no agency.

Signal’s soundscape manifests that acute loneliness that encapsulates when you’re waiting on someone else. When you’re waiting on someone who you might even know will let you down. But still, you wait. Because…

We each have our reasons.

Placing trust in another so often fails us. So why do we try again and again to believe? This time it’ll be different. This time it’ll be how it’s meant to be. And the song matches this hope as it swells periodically.

The thing is, it’ll never be how I want it unless I make it so. Unless I believe in myself to create the actions I want to see through.

In the track’s last moments, the music builds, revealing a deep frustration with this current state of being: one of wanting and not receiving. It’s SOHN’s desperation to become what he wants to be. The wave calls him out of his waiting.

Oh I’ve been travelling, waiting for a moment of peace.” 

Don’t wait, just be the peace.

 

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